I fight back kicking and screaming...

What's his deal?

It wasn't an unusual week. Nothing significant happened. There were no major incidents, no special occurrences, no awful or sad events. In fact, it was a pretty decent week. My hubby and I walked 12 miles this week. One hike in particular was spectacular and stunningly beautiful. I prayed several times a day, and we dug deep into the story of Jonah at our Sunday church service. We both signed up to volunteer at our church. Randy has been chosen for parking lot duty (directing traffic and shoveling in the winter) and I will be either on the tech team (lighting/video/sound) or with Adventureland -- our children's classes. We visited my grandpa, who turned 87, and listened to him reminisce about times as a kid in Tennessee. We even got new computers at work, and I made my goal.

I have much to be thankful for. In fact, I am always saying, "Thank you God!" or "I am blessed."

So what's the problem???

Man, this Satan dude is making me feel... well, heavy. I have to chuckle, because I must be very important to God if the Evil One is messing with me so badly. Usually I can fight him off with a bit of spiritual weaponry -- Scripture and prayer and love.

But he's pulling me down a bit harder this week. Yanking me, when in the past he's just tugged on me a little bit. I can't help but to think, too, that time is getting closer and he's frantically giving his last attempt to drag us with away from Christ. Like his last hail mary or something (ha-ha... cute pun, eh?).

I can't put my finger on it. But I'm edgy. Heavy. I'm not sleeping well. I get frustrated and feel disappointed in the things going on in the world around me. My skin is breaking out... my eyes are dry and scratchy... my back is a bit sore... and I just cannot get comfortable. I want to scream, kick, yell, fight and cry. I get angry and frustrated. I admit I call out to God, wondering why we're still here. Why ARE we still here? Lord, your children are tired and weary. We know many people are becoming saved every day, but we're so tired. We want to go home! I want a body that feels light. I want a smile that doesn't fade into a frown. I want the lines in my forehead to go away. I want to run without hurting. I'd like to go a day without talking about our budget or being cut off at the freeway merger.

I'm tired. Weary. I can almost hear that evil Satan chuckling as he yanks me harder, thinking he has me.

So what happens now? What do I do in these times when he attempt to drown me and pull me under?????

I fight back kicking and screaming... and singing.

Ha-ha!!! I've got a secret weapon that he forgets I pull out now and then. Something more startling, more cunning, more effective at catching him off guard than any other piece of spiritual weaponry out there...

I sing. And I sing LOUDLY. You should see me!!! I'm a total dork. My windows are down, my music is turned up, and I'm singing at the top of my lungs as I drive home from work. A lot of times I sing Christmas carols (regardless of what time of year it is).

When I make dinner, I sing. When I'm in the shower, I sing. Man, I'm bad at it -- at least when I'm out of my comfort zone key, that is. Sometimes I even get the dogs next door barking. It may not be pretty, but I know that it gets the good Lord grinning. I know it gets Satan acting like that wimpy Wicked Witch of the West, moaning, "What a world, what a world!" It irritates him, because my heart starts to feel lighter and I begin to smile in my heart. When I'm listening to music or singing, all of the bad stuff goes away. Worship songs are awesome, and they're my favorite to sing in church or in my car. But I also love those "positive, upbeat" Christian songs that are a little more mainstream.

Did you know that the word "sing" appears 107 times in the Bible?

Judges 5:3 says, "Hear this, you kings! Listen, you rulers! I will sing to the LORD, I will sing; I will make music to the LORD, the God of Israel."

"Rejoice in the LORD and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart!" States Psalm 32:11.

Music is awesome. And I find that when I'm feeling heavy, weepy, weary and frustrated... when I can feel Satan tugging on my limbs in efforts to drag me down... when I feel my heart beating slower in frustration or sadness... I bring music into my life.

Stay tuned... Next I'll tell you how I absolutely cannot ever sing in a choir -- no matter what -- despite how much music means to me. And it has nothing to do with my voice. ;o)

Rejoice, brothers and sisters. Kick that nasty Satan right where it hurts. Break away from him and smile big as the music surrounds you. Feel Christ in your heart as you sing with all of your might...

...and feel God's blessings with each beat and each word.

Amen to that!